Order in the (family law) Court! This is a minuscule picture but at least you get a thumbnail image of Jeff Bostwick, our former Bishop when we first moved to La Jolla. For the past ten years, Bishop Bostwick has been known professionally as San Diego Superior Court Judge Jeff Bostwick.Jane Thurston showed me a video of Bishop Bostwick being interviewed about divorce and experiences he has had both as a family law attorney and currently as a judge in the family court system.
Bishop Bostwick pointed out a difference between criminal law courts and family law courts that I found fascinating. He referred to criminal courts as a place where you might see "the worst people at their very best" but in a family law court you often see "the best people at their very worst." Think about that for a second; it's a profound assessment!
He said the family law courtroom has sadly taken on a stadium-like mentality. In recent years he's noticed less respect and less self regulation by people of their impulses. Many parents have become more contentious. More parents are willing to keep their children in conflict. Very sad!
For Judge Bostwick his 1st priority as a family law judge is the children! Addressing child sharing issues is usually at the crux and nearly always requires some compromise from people who aren't willing to make concessions. Tricky stuff! A judge needs to remain impartial but a judge is not blind; they need to assess the credibility of witnesses and watch for deceit.
In an ideal world one parent would never say a disparaging thing about the other parent. But in family law courts the landscape has become so conflicted that it can feel like a battle zone. I thought the most poignant comment in Judge Bostwick's interview was his statement that "most people never understand the danger and impact their divorce will have on their children."
Watching the Judge Bostwick interview was enlightening on a glimpse of society I rarely see much of. We've been lucky that not too many close friends or family members with children have divorced! But those we've seen are generally sad and emotionally tough on everyone!
Bishop Bostwick has exactly the right temperament to serve as a judge; full of integrity, no nonsense, steady and consistent. It was fun to see him in a different light (as a professional vs. a church volunteer). It also brought a dose of nostalgia for La Jolla and memories in SoCal.
